CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Tem couldn’t begin to understand the way Caspen was looking at her. If she didn’t know better, she’d allow herself to hope. But hope was painful, and there was no room for it in her heart. So she sat up.
Caspen sat up too, and for a moment, there was silence. When he spoke, his voice was a whisper:
“Do you know why I gave you a piece of myself?”
He was referring to the claw. Tem had always wondered why he had done it—what exactly it had meant to him.
“No,” she said quietly. “Why?”
His fingers returned to her face, cupping her cheek with his palm.
“You surprised me.”
Tem’s heart leapt at his words. It was the ultimate compliment considering how many people he had surely met in his unusually long life.
“How?”
The corner of his mouth twitched. “You asked me to undress.”
“Oh. I can’t believe I did that. I figured it would make you angry.”
“On the contrary. It made me curious.”
“Curious?”
“Yes,” he was still holding her face. “It made me want to know you.”
“But why?”
“Because, Tem,” he pulled her closer. “You’re worth knowing.”
Tem shook her head. It was incomprehensible. There was no other word for it. To think that she could offer anything of value to a basilisk was an impossibility. She didn’t understand, and she feared she never would.
“We were strangers,” she whispered. “How could you think that?”
Caspen traced his thumb under her chin, pulling her gaze up to his.
“I find you extraordinary, Tem.”
Tem couldn’t fathom that. At her expression, Caspen leaned in.
“Is that so difficult to believe?”
Tem scoffed. “You’re the extraordinary one.”
Caspen tilted his head in the way he did when he was considering something.
“What do you find extraordinary about me?” He asked.
“Everything,” she answered immediately.
“Be specific.”
Tem frowned. She wasn’t sure why he would demand that of her. But it wasn’t a hard question, and she easily answered:
“Your knowledge. Your patience. I have neither.”
“My knowledge I have gained over centuries. My patience likewise. Those things do not make me extraordinary, and you should not measure yourself against them.”
Tem was surprised at his tone. He almost seemed angry.
“I meant to compliment you,” she said.
“You complimented me at the expense of yourself.”
She shrugged. “I don’t know how to do it otherwise.”
He shook his head.
“You are the extraordinary one.”
“No. I’m not. I’m utterly ordinary.”
Caspen sighed.
“That is patently untrue. But I do not expect you to believe me.”
“You don’t?”
“No,” he said, the gold of his eyes flashing in the dim firelight. “You do not see yourself as I do.”
He spoke calmly, as if his words were the ultimate truth. Yet Tem could not believe him. Years of cruel taunts ran through her mind—Vera’s, the other schoolchildren’s. Tem knew what other people thought of her; she knew how she felt in comparison to others. She hoped to one day see herself as Caspen saw her, but she doubted that day was today. Still, she asked:
“How do you see me?”
His eyes remained on hers for a long moment. Then he said:
“It would be easier to show you.”
Before Tem had time to wonder what that meant, Caspen was pulling her to her feet. He positioned her so she stood in front of the full-length mirror with him standing behind her. Gently, the motion so slow she barely noticed it was happening, he unlaced the linen shirt and slipped it from her shoulders. It fell to the ground. Then he brushed her hair back so she was completely uncovered.
Despite herself, Tem blushed. She rarely used the mirror at home, and when she did she never looked at herself naked—certainly not for any prolonged amount of time. Her body had changed, she realized, since the last time she had really seen it. The awkward angles of her childhood were long gone. She had curves now, and rather impressive ones, thanks to the additional meals after her training sessions with Caspen. Her skin was dark from hours spent outside on the farm, and her hair had lost its tight curls as it lengthened, framing her face with soft, graceful waves.
Caspen’s hands were moving again, tracing lightly up her arms to the base of her neck. His fingers covered, then squeezed, her throat before brushing over her breasts and continuing down to her waist. When he reached her hips he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tightly against his body. His chin rested on her head.
“Look at you,” he whispered. “Perfection.”
Tem stared at the two of them in the mirror. She supposed it was possible someone might consider her pretty. But it took only one look at Caspen to dispel the notion that he could believe anything of the sort. His muscles were perfectly toned, his arms flexed in rigid precision around her waist. His jawline stood out in sharp contrast to the soft lines of her face, and his hair was somehow perfectly styled. Tem felt an insistent jab of jealousy as she looked at him. She would never hold herself the way he did—with such easy elegance—she would never look that effortless. She felt herself retreating inward, to the place where she’d learned to hide from the bullies at school. Caspen’s voice was suddenly in her mind.
Do not do that.
Do what?
Do not compare yourself to me. I already told you I am nothing to aspire to.
It was so patently untrue that Tem actually snorted. She tried to pull away, but Caspen only held her tighter.
I am not letting you go until you grasp this.
Then we’re going to be standing here a long time.
Caspen’s annoyance surged, then retreated. In its place came a gentle wave of understanding—a beam of pure empathy that seeped right into Tem’s heart and warmed her to the core.
Very well. We will try something different.
Tem had no idea what to expect.
A moment later, a curious sensation overtook her. It felt as if Caspen were pulling her—drawing her consciousness away from her body and down the shared corridor between their minds. For a moment, everything went completely black. When light returned, Tem was still looking at herself in the mirror. But instead of looking straight ahead, she was looking down, and she realized with a jolt that this was Caspen’s perspective. She was inside his eyes—inside his mind—and she was seeing herself, literally, from his viewpoint.
Tem felt herself start to panic. What if she couldn’t return to her mind? What if she—
Relax, little viper.
Caspen’s voice was so loud Tem saw her reflection jump in the mirror. It came from all directions, as if she were standing in the middle of a tiny room and a hundred people were yelling his words at her. Tem tried to say something back, but found that she couldn’t. Her panic only increased, and with it, his amusement.
Untamable, as always.
As soon as he said it, Tem felt her panic disappear. She was calm because he was calm.
Now pay attention.
His focus, and hers, returned to the mirror.
It was like looking at herself through a kaleidoscope—the childish toys she had played with at the market after church—except instead of seeing a rainbow of fractured colors, she saw herself through all five senses. Suddenly she could smell her own scent—at least, how she smelled to Caspen—which was warm and rich and something else that she immediately recognized, but couldn’t name.
The sea. Caspen supplemented softly. You always smell like the sea.
Tem had never been to the sea. But her mother kept a bottle of salt spray on her dresser and ever since Tem could remember, she had stolen spritzes from it for herself, spraying it in her hair to texturize her curls and rubbing it on her wrists so she could smell it throughout the day. She’d always been drawn to that clear glass bottle, always loved the cool, salty spray that made her dream of places far away from her life on the chicken farm.
Tem’s eyes—Caspen’s eyes—traveled over her body once again. The sensation was completely unnerving, and if Caspen weren’t holding her body up, she was sure she would’ve fainted. But every time she came close to panicking again, Caspen calmed her down, soothing her with his mind as he showed her how it felt to look at her.
His gaze wasn’t sexual, exactly, although it was impossible to remove sex from a basilisk’s mind entirely. It was more intimate than anything, and Tem watched in fascination as Caspen’s eyes explored the curve of her hips, the dip of her collarbones, the soft crease where her thighs met. She felt his craving for her—the ache of want that lurked just beneath the surface of his thoughts—and the herculean effort it took him to suppress it.
There was such unrestrained certainty in his desire—such unparalleled ownership—that Tem finally understood what Caspen had said earlier. Protecting her was his most basic instinct. It was at the forefront of his mind, even greater than his lust, which was stronger than anything she had ever felt. Caspen wanted her—needed—her. There was nothing he wouldn’t do for her, nothing he wouldn’t sacrifice—including himself—if it would guarantee her safety. Tem couldn’t believe Caspen was willing to be this vulnerable. It was like seeing straight into his heart. Everything he had said was true.
He found her extraordinary.
Again and again, his gaze fell to her neck, where her pulse was visibly beating. She made a mental note that he liked that area.
That should not come as a surprise.
She had forgotten he could hear her thoughts. At this proximity, he could probably control them.
Nobody could control you, Tem. But even if I could, I would not.
She watched as Caspen traced his fingers slowly across her waist. The sensation was completely foreign to Tem. She could feel every one of her own heartbeats pounding insistently beneath his fingertips, speeding up as he trailed his hand down her stomach. The temperature of her skin increased the lower his hand went, and when he slipped his fingers inside her, she gasped, but not because she felt anything between her legs.
Instead, she felt what he felt, which was a tidal wave of hunger so deeply animalistic and desperate that she had no idea how he didn’t unleash it immediately. He wanted her so, so badly—more, if it were even physically possible, than she wanted him. He wanted to taste her, he wanted to fuck her, he wanted to bury himself inside her. He wanted to hear the sounds she made when she came, and he wanted to hear them over and over and over again. He wanted to be the only one who understood her body, the only one who knew what turned her on, the only one to pleasure her.
Caspen wanted her on a primal level—one that went far beyond the limitations of his species or her courtship with the prince. He wanted her in a way that was possessive, irreversible, and guaranteed to result in consequences if he didn’t have her. He wanted her more than life itself, because a life without her wasn’t one he cared to live.
Finally, Tem understood the effect she had on Caspen—how irresistible she was to him—how far beyond the physical their connection truly went. She saw how they had been balancing on a treacherously thin knife’s edge ever since the night they met, and Caspen was finally done fighting the inevitable. She was his sun. He revolved around her.
“Now do you believe me?” he whispered in her ear.
Tem was back in her body, standing in front of the mirror.
For once, the answer was yes. But rather than say it, Tem did what she knew Caspen wanted most; she turned around and pressed her lips to his.
They fell onto his bed together, their bodies intertwining on top of the silk sheets.
He had kissed her many times already, but this time was different. This time Caspen gave Tem no commands. This time they were equals, both deserving of pleasure from the other. He was no longer her teacher; she was no longer his student. They were just two lovers, experiencing each other the way lovers should.
Tem had seen inside Caspen’s mind, so she knew everything he wanted to do with her. And yet he followed her lead, kissing her with tender devotion, only deepening the kiss when she pulled him closer—only slipping his fingers inside her when she spread her legs. His restraint only turned Tem on more. He was letting her take the lead—ceding his power—something he’d never done before.
His caressed her gently, his touch like a ripple in a still lake. Tem touched him too, pulling off his trousers and wrapping her fingers around his cock. Caspen let out a shudder as she did so, and at his reaction, Tem felt a sudden surge of confidence. She placed her palm flat on his chest, pushing him away from her.
Momentary concern flashed across Caspen’s face. Tem smiled softly to reassure him. Then she tilted her knees, allowing her legs to fall all the way open.
She was ready now.
“Tem,” Caspen breathed.
It was all he said, yet it was more than enough. For a moment, he did nothing but stare reverently at the center of her. Blackness overtook his eyes, driving away any trace of gold. The air around them grow even warmer as he bent forward, trailing his lips along the curve of her stomach. His fingers wrapped around her thighs, pulling them open even more. Caspen kissed the inner hollows of her legs—one and then the other.
He paused to look up at her, tacitly asking permission one last time. Tem nodded.
Then he lowered his head and his mouth met the part of her she’d only ever dreamed a man would taste.
The second Caspen’s tongue touched her, a swell of hunger passed through his mind and into Tem’s, blurring the lines between them until she didn’t know where his desire ended and hers began. Tem moaned as he swirled his tongue slowly around her clitoris, easing his entire mouth against her. They had barely begun, and yet she already felt like she was seconds away from losing control. Despite herself, she was suddenly self conscious.
Tem. Caspen said in her mind. Let me do this for you.
Tem closed her eyes.
He was so, so good at this. Tem shouldn’t have been surprised; he’d had centuries of experience, after all. But she wondered if his presence in her mind made him even better. It seemed like he was catering to her every thought. When she wished he would go deeper, he did. When she wished he would touch her a certain way, he did.
First his tongue was on her clitoris, then it was inside her, dipping into her wetness, tasting the heaven he’d wanted to taste for so long. There was no mistaking how much he liked it. She felt his adoration in every stroke, heard his devotion in the way his moans joined hers. He slid a finger inside her, and the temporary change in sensation made her weak. Tem knew he was widening her—coaxing her apart like the petals of a flower—preparing her for what was to come later.
She gasped as Caspen slipped another finger inside her, holding her open to give his tongue even greater access. It was exhilarating to have his head between her legs—to see him bow to her as if he were in prayer. Tem had no idea how she’d survived without such pleasure for so long, and if she never felt it again, she wouldn’t survive that either.
His tongue was unstoppable, his fingers pushing deeper and deeper. It felt better than she’d ever imagined, and she’d imagined it a hundred times. Caspen was losing himself in her, gaining as much as he was giving, devouring her as if he had been starving until this moment.
He began pumping his fingers in a steady rhythm, sucking on her clitoris at the same time. The combination of sensations was so overwhelming that Tem covered her mouth with her hand, afraid of the noises she might make.
Suddenly, he stopped.
Tem’s eyes flew open as Caspen sat up. He leaned forward, pulling her hand away from her mouth.
Do not hide from me.
She understood that there was nothing she could do that would push him away. He only wanted more from her. More from her body, more from her mind, more from her heart.
Instead of leaning down again, Caspen placed his entire palm between her legs, splaying his fingers flat on her stomach and working the heel of his hand back and forth over her wetness. The strict, repetitive motion was nearly more than Tem could bear. Her clitoris was throbbing beneath his relentless touch, and suddenly she couldn’t have stayed quiet if she’d tried.
Caspen watched her as he touched her, his eyes drinking in every inch of her body. Her hands went to her breasts, squeezing and cupping them in a mirror of their first interaction. Only now it was Caspen’s hand between her legs instead of hers; now they were doing what they were always meant to do—becoming what they were always meant to become.
Demand flared in Caspen’s eyes. He could only go so long without tasting her.
His head dipped again, and this time Tem threaded her fingers into his hair, pulling him as close as she could. She let out a desperate whine; it still wasn’t enough.
Caspen stilled his tongue.
Use me, Tem.
Tem understood his command. She tightened her grip, arching her hips to meet his mouth, grinding up against him again and again. He gripped her back, making it easy for her to take exactly what she needed from him. Tem moaned shamelessly. There was simply nothing in the universe that felt better than this. She knew what was building within her; she knew she was about to fall apart for him.
Just when her climax was imminent, Caspen pulled away.
Tem drew in a sharp breath. She was so close. But Caspen had always been this way; he never let her have it easily.
Her clitoris was swollen and tender. She let out a helpless whimper as Caspen trailed a single finger over it, the motion setting her entire body on fire. His voice surged into her mind:
Mine. Only mine.
Tem nodded eagerly.
Yours. Only yours.
His hiss of approval reverberated around the room.
Caspen lowered his head again, and this time he stayed there. Between his fingers and his tongue, Tem couldn’t control herself anymore. Her moans became desperate as her back arched away from the sheets.
Caspen, she cried into her mind.
I need it, Tem, he said back. Give it to me.
All her walls were down; all her defenses destroyed. There was nothing Tem wanted more than to give Caspen what he wanted, and get what she wanted in return.
So she let it build.
The insistent wave of pleasure grew, and Tem knew neither of them would stop it this time. Anticipation pricked up her spine; her body was tensing—coiling—preparing for release. She grasped the sheets as Caspen angled his fingers up, pulling a moan from her throat as he pressed against the very core of her. When he clamped her clitoris tightly between his teeth, she was done for.
Tem cried out as her body finally let go.
If it weren’t for their connection in her mind, she might not have known Caspen was coming too. But she felt his pleasure lace undeniably into hers, taking her further than she could have ever gone alone. As they rode their waves together, Tem felt something seal itself between them—a bond that could never be broken. They belonged to each other now; there was no going back to the way things had been before they’d shared this essential, fundamental thing.
Tem was completely wet from her climax. But it was clear that Caspen had no intention of stopping. He was licking away her wetness—swallowing it—savoring it like it was the best thing he had ever tasted. There could be no mistaking his enjoyment. Even if they hadn’t been connected through their minds, she would have heard it in his groans—groans that only became more urgent the more he tasted her.
The air was getting undeniably warmer.
Tem knew they were in uncharted territory. It was impossible not to acknowledge the danger she was in—the danger they were both in. If Caspen lost control like he did last time, there was no guarantee he wouldn’t hurt her. They were all alone in his chambers—if anything happened, she was completely unprotected. Tem knew they were taking a risk. But she also knew how precious she was to him.
Caspen’s tongue was suddenly rough and coarse against her clitoris. Tem gasped at the sudden change in texture, her hips jerking upward in surprise. Caspen only held her tighter, his hands clamping her hips in place, holding her down so he could lick her even deeper.
The dynamic between them was shifting.
His sole purpose was no longer only to pleasure her. Now Caspen was taking as much as he was giving—consuming her wetness like he needed it to survive. A deafening hiss filled the cave as he pushed his tongue even further inside her. It went impossibly far—she ached as if she were being stretched. Tem moaned as he teased her clitoris and penetrated her center at the same time. Realization hit her like a bolt of lightning.
His tongue had split.
Tem recognized the extraordinary self control he must be exhibiting in order to transition only this single part of him. Smoke rose from his shoulders, filling the air and skimming up Tem’s body in soft, shadowy streams. Tendrils curved around the sides of her breasts before flowing up her arms and pinning her wrists to the mattress.
It didn’t matter that he was a predator and she was his prey. There was no stopping him, and she didn’t want to anyway. They were inevitable; the beast in him called to the beast in her.
Caspen had a need that begged to be fulfilled. A hunger only Tem could sate.
Her legs were open wide; every part of her was exposed. He feasted on her with reckless abandon, his head dipping over and over as he ravished her with his tongue. Tem was helpless, her hands pinned above her head by the warm tendrils of smoke. It didn’t matter; she didn’t want to move anyway. There was nothing she wouldn’t let him do. No part of herself she wouldn’t give to him if he wanted it. His hunger awoke a twin flame in her—one that yearned to be fed.
Tem could do nothing but surrender—to Caspen, to herself, to pleasure.
His tongue was on her clitoris. And inside her. And when his fingers penetrated her too, she nearly came right then and there. It was too much; she was going to explode.
“Caspen!” She cried.
He only buried himself deeper. She was thrashing against the smoky constraints, her hips bucking as he stimulated something in her she hadn’t known she was capable of feeling. Everything culminated in a pinnacle—the splayed points of her body colliding in a single, perfect point. Tem’s core contracted.
With a rush of euphoric release, she came.
Caspen’s hiss of approval was deafening. There could be no doubt that she was giving him exactly what he needed—that her orgasm was feeding the part of him that craved her.
Tem felt suddenly weak, as if she had just sprinted a long distance. The tendrils of smoke released her as Caspen licked her softly, and she knew he had returned his tongue once more to its human form. He pressed kisses down her inner leg, keeping his fingers inside her as he bit her thigh, pinching her skin between his teeth—surely leaving a bruise—giving her an undeniable reminder of their union.
Tem couldn’t wait to look at that bruise tomorrow.
Finally, Caspen raised his head. They stared at each other in silent awe, as if neither of them could believe what had just happened. As if what they had shared was beyond comprehension.
He propped himself up and leaned in for a kiss. His tongue slid against hers, and she tasted herself on it.
See?
The rest of his question went unsaid, but Tem knew what he was asking. There was only one answer:
Yes.
He pulled away slowly.
Caspen laid his cock between her legs, the head nearly touching her belly button.
He placed his hand over the base of his shaft, pressing it against her wetness and sliding his cock slowly through the channel of his palm, mimicking the motion she knew he wanted to do inside her.
“Tem,” his eyes raked up her body, “I need you. Now.”
She raised her gaze to his.
“So have me.”